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More House Hunting

July 25, 2004 03:50

While the other house we looked at is currently in negotiations with the winning bidder, and may yet become available again, although likely for far more than I'm willing to pay for it, we decided to pursue other wonderful opportunities. Here I shall extol the glory of the fine upstanding homes we looked at today. Proceed at your own risk.

Our first stop was this wonderful house. Three bedrooms, two bathrooms, and a few other features I'm sure you'll agree will result in a quick sale of this impressive achievement of repossession.

As you might suspect, that is in fact a plywood patch decor on the front porch. We suspect the previous owner was an artist and this is some new eclectic design, but there's always the rare possibility that they were hoping to subtly cover up gaping holes in the wall. The world may never know.

You will notice here the lovely carpet pattern, which incidently is repeated throughout the entire house. The odor upon entering is a musky scent.

A hallway view of the master bedroom shows an even more interesting carpet design. As far as we can determine, it consists of carpet, dog urine, muddy footprints, and a black fluid substance presently unknown to science. Further research and lab cultures will be required to determine if any new forms of life have evolved in this pristine environment. Although the dog urine MIGHT have contributed to the almost overpowering stench of the home, there certainly must be more to it than that. Certainly....

The next home we looked at is the same floorplan as the first, but with extra foliage in the front yard.

The floor in the living area at first appears to be tile. On further research, you will instead discover that they simply painted the foundation. Clearly a slight patchup job is required.

Something in this picture is missing.

Here too.

At first glance, you might think that this house was infested with canines with bladder problems as well. At second and third glance, along with sensory input from the olfactory glands, you will indeed determine that those are in fact urine stains, and they are in fact contributing to the atmospheric ambiance.

A non transparent, non translucent window. We used to call them doors or walls, but certainly somewhere, somehow, there is a market for this hotly desired product.

This one looks nice.

Still looks nice.

Still looks nice.

STILL looks nice.

AND it has a hot tub!

This one looked very nice, both from the outside and inside, although we weren't able to enter the house, so we can't give you a firsthand impression of the likely pet contingent of the previous owners. From a "peering in a window suspiciously" observational position, we determined that it's probably in great condition, and therefore certainly out of our pricerange.

This house is blue. As Gertie said the other day, it's her favorite of all the blue houses. It still will get a paintjob, should we someday call it ours.

A rental/FSBO house we looked at. Very good shape, both inside and outside, and vacant. Nothing shocking to show you, so here's a picture of Gertie from the back.

And from the side.

A matchbox of a house. This was in relatively good shape, compared to some of the others we looked at, yet still in need of work.

This one looks somewhat decent from the outside.

The previous occupants, which may or may not have been there with permission of the owner, have added their own intellegent artistic flavor to the decor. At this point, you're left to wonder. Should we paint the walls 5 times, or just rip them out completely.

And to finish things off, another picture of half of Gertie. And the storage shed. Which apparently has no floor. Walls and a rainproof roof also seem to be precious commodities too.

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