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Think of them as hints

March 28, 2003 09:08

If your boyfriend breaks up with you, stop having sex with him.

If two people break up with you and give you the same reason, you might want to start paying attention to the reason.

If you're going to tell a lie to someone, make sure they can't confirm it with only a single phone call.

If someone is recording your phone conversation and tells you that he's going to turn that recording over to the police, don't tell him you're doing something illegal.

If your core audience is red blooded American, don't make anti-American statements in public.

It takes two people to cheat in a relationship. They're both scumbags.

When you first meet someone you like, figure out the top 5 most uncomfortable things about yourself, and tell him/her all of them the first day.

Outlandish statements won't be supported without proof. Obtain proof BEFORE opening your mouth.

If in doubt, obey the law.

If you feel the need to stalk, that means the answer is no.

If you feel the need to tell someone that they don't have a life, it's because you have too much free time, meaning you don't have one either.